A Labeled View

Most people will label life as good as long as everything is going their way. There can always be peace regardless of the circumstances, but only if it’s seen how all things are impermanent, including life itself…


On life being labeled good or not, if you’re thinking it isn’t it won’t be, and even if you label it as so, it will still not be good if that’s not what you truly believe; I equate this to whistling in the dark to keep fear away . As long as you’re whistling the distraction will keep the fear in check, but the moment you stop it will return. The key is to identify why you think life isn’t good and be with it as it is. People say be positive, but being positive to me is still whistling to distract from fear. Some unpleasant things do happen in life and if it’s just masked over and ignored, it becomes ingrained as an energy pattern in the subconscious that never goes away; this is how life gets labeled. Life itself is always good, it’s people who are conditioned to make it something else, this is the lie of the Conditioned Mind.


Life will be good when it’s seen in the light of how all things are impermanent including life itself. Believe me I get it, being ill, losing a loved one, living in poverty, and many others things that occur in life are labeled as bad, but what makes one think it’s bad is the attachment to it. Labeling it as bad doesn’t change what’s occurring, it only changes the label used as life being good or bad. When the true essence of life (impermanence) is understood, it puts life at the top of the good scale regardless of what’s going on because it’s seen that one day life in this form simply will not be…

Space of What Is

If your beliefs aren’t questioned they‘ll control you even though they don’t truly provide the pleasure they’re being created for. They can’t because the nature of a belief is attachment and attachment is the root of suffering…

At the center of every belief there’s an appointed authority that makes it so. This appointed authority manifest from an inner structure that is created so we can live in a pleasurable way. We believe in everything we have in place because it’s decided (even though it was probably done unconsciously) that beliefs make life better. There’s no other reason to form a belief except for the purpose it will provide pleasure in some way. Look into this very carefully to see how this manifest in your life. God, money, material possessions, love, programs, spirituality, social status, enlightenment, and so on, are all formed to provide a fictitious pleasure based in a belief. If this isn’t questioned the belief will continue its control even though it doesn’t truly provide the pleasure that it’s being created for. It can’t because the nature of any belief is attachment and attachment to anything is suffering.

Many call beliefs faith, but to me they’re basically just a made up story. I haven’t found one iota of usefulness in having faith or believing in something that would truly benefit my life. I live in the space of what is and since there isn’t anything that needs to be different than the way it is right now there’s no benefit in attaching to a belief. True liberation is in the space of not needing anything other than what it is. It doesn’t take any effort or story to be liberated. The reason why so many don’t become liberated is they try to create it by forming a belief about it; if I do this or that, liberation will follow. People worry more about getting to heaven than the here and now and because of this life passes you by while you are here on earth. It doesn’t take a belief to see this, but it will take a mind that’s settled not to make it into one…

A Blessed Life

Things don’t make life a blessing, simply being alive is the blessing and the gift because no matter what is attained it will not be taken with you when life in this form ends…

As I reflect back on the difference of my life today as opposed to twelve years ago I would have to say that it’s the people that are a part of my life today that makes it what it is. I want to thank everyone who is a part of my journey whether it is directly or indirectly. No one is more important than another because whatever anyone does it’s all used as a tool to learn from. We are alive together at this time so we are on this journey together. I was an isolator for many years even though I had many people in my life. Because of the people in my life today, isolation is not a part of it. I am sharing my journey and people are sharing theirs in return.

I have been taught about the importance of people through all of you. Without all of you I would once again be the isolator and for me isolation leads to a very lonely place. I have been afforded many opportunities because of my connection with people. The one thing that all the opportunities have in common is they are all directed to helping each other, it is a very different way for me. I am so grateful for this turnaround in my view of life.

One of the many opportunities for me was going back to my former high school as the keynote speaker for a graduation ceremony. To me it’s such an honor and blessing and it was a direct result of the people in my life today. The love people have for me is the love I give to others, and from the bottom of heart I thank you all for this…

A Benefit to All

If what you do in life is from a heart of love the entire world will benefit from it. If not, no one will benefit from it, not even you because all that is done will be from the self serving mind…


Ask yourself this question before you do something, is this going to be a benefit to me and others or not? If your answer is not and you still do it, you shouldn’t be surprised by the consequences you get from your choice. I would venture to say if it’s not a benefit to you I would highly doubt that it would be a benefit to anyone else and the consequences will be accordingly.


This is a good tool to use if you have gotten to the point in your life where there is some space between your thoughts; a split second is all that’s needed. The first forty nine years of my life there was never this space and because my mind was conditioned to self serve there wasn’t much that was done that was a benefit to me or anyone else. The real issue here is most of what was done was of the self serving variety and it was usually destructive not constructive.


So think about it the next time you’re planning to do something, ask yourself if what you’re going to do is from a heart of love. And how you will know if your answer is yes is if what you’re doing is a benefit to you and to all beings, more so all beings. If not maybe you should learn how to do things differently so whatever you do you in life is based in love and is a benefit to the entire world, not just a limited self serving you…

Living as Intended

Our intended life is meant to be lived in the present, but sometimes our unintended desires disrupt this. To be anchored in love is to be present for our intended life…


Sometimes it is difficult to know what is the most beneficial thing to do. I’m not talking about clearly recognizable things, sometimes it isn’t so clear as to what should be done. It’s especially difficult when it involves other people. I think for myself I need to learn to let go more and be more anchored in love. To me this is all part of the learning and letting go curve. It matters little what’s in the heart if what comes out of the mouth isn’t of love.


Our learning curve is not to be held onto in strict adherence, it’s more so used to stay open in the expanding of your view of love and not getting caught up in a self serving view. Love and tolerance have to be at the forefront when others are involved. It’s not always easy to understand where others are coming from so it’s better not to judge and deal with situations from a place of neutrality. This is so much easier said than done, but by practicing quietness it gets easier to decipher what the beneficial action is.


Although our journey may seem mundane at times, it’s only a self-serving mind that makes it this way. Life can never be mundane, only we make it so. Each moment of each day is new unto itself, and when it’s lived in the present it will be realized what a gift we have and the present is our life. It will be understood that what our learning curve affords us is not the mundane life of living in the past or future, but the ability to live in the present more and more and respond to life from a place of love instead of reacting to it from a self-serving mind. The more this is done, the less mundane life will be and the more it will be lived in harmony with all beings as intended…

Heart Expansion

When you can truly be present for the energy of the heart, all resistance falls away because it’s understood the heart provides expansion and allows freedom. Make this the day your mind doesn’t hold you back…

Most change is resisted and the reason why is because it’s not understood that change is inevitable. If you like cake you wouldn’t want to eat it at every meal. Change is inevitable, but resistance to it doesn’t have to be. Make this the day that your mind doesn’t hold you back. See change as an opening to get you unstuck from the complacency of what’s familiar. Nobody really changes unless they’re forced to because the mind loves the familiar; even if the familiar isn’t what’s most beneficial. I see it all the time in the responses to my articles. All my articles do is provide another way to look at things, but many times they’re just discounted by the resistive energy that’s in place. I lived a conditioned existence for many years so I know what I’m talking about. Not many people truly understand their conditioning so when something new is presented, the resistive energy rears its ugly head and you remain locked to your conditioning.

Change is a natural part of life. It happens constantly whether consciously or unconsciously, but what’s not grasped is although the mind is conditioned to hold onto the familiar, change is needed to expand beyond the familiar. For years I was stuck in familiar mind patterns that didn’t allow anything new in. Even when it looked as though change was occurring, it was only on the surface. Surface change is a society measurement and it’s mostly a facade. True change is a transformation from the head to the heart and it can’t be measured. When you can truly be present for the energy of the heart, all resistance falls away because it’s understood the heart provides expansion and allows freedom so make this the day your mind doesn’t hold you back…

Unguarded Thinking

It’s important to notice your thinking because even if what you do comes from a labeled place of love, this label produces the bondage of unguarded thinking which controls you like all unguarded thinking…

If you can’t watch your own thinking to decipher if it’s truly beneficial, hold on because you’ll be taken on the roller coaster ride of life. Not that life does anything directly to you, but thinking arises and these determines what kind of ride you will be on. Noticing your unguarded thinking is essential if you’re not to be controlled by it. Thinking is a natural part of life, it will occur. As far as I know there’s no way of controlling the thinking that arises, but I have found that noticing it allows for a split second hesitation that can be used to decipher whether or not what you are thinking is beneficial; remember attachment causes suffering, no matter how it’s labeled.

I often say the Conditioned Mind is diabolical and unless there’s some awareness of how you are controlled by thinking, it will and this has to happen, control you as if you were a puppet on a string. So subtle is this control that even if you are doing things that are labeled as loving, if this thinking isn’t watched it will control you and bondage is bondage regardless of what label is applied to your thinking. This is why the Conditioned Mind is diabolical because of its subtleness in using whatever it can to remain in control. This is also why it’s so important to notice your thinking because even if what you do comes from a labeled place of love, the bondage this produces is that of unguarded thinking which controls you like all unguarded thinking…

Already Validated

We need nothing to be complete, but at times we look to others for our validation because it’s not understood that the only true validation needed comes from within ourselves…

Others should never be allowed to be the source of your validation because the driving force behind it may not be warranted. A few months ago I was approached by someone about my writings who said they have really evolved and was told I was doing a very good job and to keep it up. I proceeded to tell them I wasn’t really doing anything differently than I had done previously, but I thanked them and didn’t give it much thought. The funny thing is the base of my writings have always been the same.

The question is how mush should the assessment be listened to? Obviously my mind tells me to listen to it because it’s favorable, but I chose not to put my validation in what someone else says. Since nothing has changed in the way my writings are approached since day one, why should I allow someone else to affect me in any way. That’s really the point of this, until we truly love ourselves, we will always look to others for our validation. The mind wants to be told we are doing well, but it’s not really needed. It’s just that without the understanding that you are complete as you are and the worlds validation isn’t needed for this completeness, you will continue to look outside for a validation that can only occur from within because your validation is already in place…

Circular Energy

Aversion will never be driven out by aversion so if it’s not observed that aversion is in place, it will remain and the energy that you despise in another will be the same energy that’s controlling you…


Many things will cross your path throughout the day, some will be liked, some will not and others you couldn’t care less about. The key to the things that arise is being aware of them and observing which ones grab you, which ones are pushed away, and which ones naturally come and go without attaching to them because nothing sticks. These observations become more and more important as you become more aware of them. Things occur all the time, but they’re not noticed. Very few people are in touch with just observing them which allows the things that occur to be in control. Many things occur in life that aren’t particularly cared for, but all the energy that goes into not accepting them and trying to change them with non loving actions generates the same energy.


Unloving energy will never be changed with unloving energy, especially when the driving force behind it arises because you didn’t get your way. If this isn’t observed it keeps the unloving energy in place. Aversion will never be driven out by aversion, so if it’s not observed that aversion is in place it will remain and the very thing that you despise is the very thing that you become; this is the way it is when one is unconscious and allows things to affect you. There’s nothing wrong with being disappointed for a millisecond, but after that it becomes attachment and suffering begins. This suffering isn’t because things didn’t work out the way that is wanted, no the suffering arises because you have no clue the energy you despise in another is the same energy that’s controlling you…

Openness Possibilities

There are so many possibilities in life when there’s no past labels applied to what’s occurring in front of you. The Universe provides these possibilities when you’re in harmony with a life and not living in the past…

Openness is your greatest asset because without being open nothing arises or at least nothing that’s beneficial. Openness leads to possibilities never experienced before, but when the heart is closed and the mind is in control the doors to possibilities are also closed. Whatever arise in life can be seen as it is with an openness only if it’s not labeled. In this way life can be experienced anew as the Universe opens up more and more possibilities. Even if some past behavior arises, without the judgment of applying a label it allows the heart to remain open and the possibility to go beyond the past label to experience something new.

Newness doesn’t always have to be an aha moment, it can be a simple act of not judging what’s in front of you and just experiencing that and moving on. Once something is labeled, the heart closes and so do all the possibilities along with it. To experience all the possibilities that life offers is to not allow the past to be a part of what is being done right now. If it is, obviously it remains as something old not something new, but even though it may be from a past habitual mind pattern that’s in place, it’s only old because it’s labeled as such. Without applying a label, the heart remains open and the possibilities that are provided by the Universe are beyond anything a limited mind can conjure up…

Results of Your Own Actions

We are our own judge and jury and for the most part our verdicts are determined by our own actions; what is done when no one is looking. The energy you live by is a direct result of your own actions…

Remember the cartoons from years ago when a Devil and Angel would pop up on a characters shoulders. This happened when a decision was needed about something. The pop up figures were always the image of the individual, it was because that’s who the real struggle and conflict is always with. Nothing outside of you can harm you as much as your own thoughts. A struggle mostly occurs when things aren’t lining up with the story of the way you think things should be. This energy is something that’s real. You can make it like you’re this spiritual guru and behind closed doors be selfish and unloving, but you’re not fooling anyone because wherever you go there you are. The energy that you live by is a result of your own actions. You are your own judge and jury and for the most part your verdicts are determined by your own actions; what is done when no one is looking. Your own actions shape your life.

There’s nothing to prove to anyone, you can preach love and recite all the airy fairy nonsense that fits into a so called spiritual box, but if you’re not showing loving kindness to all beings, it’s all being done for one reason and that’s to satisfy the devil cartoon character (ego) on your shoulder. So many conditioned stories are made up about life and this keeps one in their own prison. You can get in touch with this simply by seeing how much love you show to all beings. Lip service means little here because it’s not only the world that gets hurt, it’s also yourself. So much arises daily as the devil and angel characters pop up, just make sure the one selected allows for the loving kindness of all beings because that’s what energy you will get in return.

Changing Your Conditioning

The only way to change the Conditioned Mind is to have something in place that will allow it to be changed. This is where quietness comes in because without it, there won’t be awareness something needs changing.

Watching television is not my favorite way to past time, but the other night I caught the last hour of a ballgame. When the game was over I began looking for something else to watch. Twenty seconds on one channel, ten seconds on another, five on another, than another and another, you get the picture. It’s amazing how we stay fixated on something, in this case the TV, when it comes to the mind. We’re so reluctant to change the conditioning even though we’re going round and round in circles. Actually what’s on the TV (the fixation) is mostly reruns, yet we’ll watch the same channel (thought) over an over. Even though there are many channels (thoughts) we get stuck on the TV and don’t know how to go to change this.

Think of something you get fixated on and see how hard it is to change your mind when it gets you in its grip. Unless there’s total awareness of this, changing your conditioning will be just about impossible. The only way to change the Conditioned Mind is to have something in place that will allow it to be changed. This is where quietness comes in because without it there won’t be awareness something needs changing. It may be a repeated thought disguised with many different labels, but it’s still an old thought. Watch the subtleness of this and in time you’ll see the mind for what it is and how it likes to default to what’s familiar. The issue is you can get so comfortable with this that it’s not realized the conditioning needs to be changed; this realization will only occur if you have something in place that’s worth changing to.

Hearts Connecting

Oneness with others comes from a deep place of love. This isn’t something that any human activity can make happen. It’s the connection to your own heart, that’s when you connect to the hearts of others…

In my experience the love of my own heart cannot expand on its own, it needs others. Deepening a connection with others, deepens the love in our heart, and this is what connects us. If this connection to each other’s hearts were to happen there would be no more greed, hate, or war because we will fall over each other in love; it’s in this love for each other that the magnificence of life is experienced. A majestic sunset, a cool summer breeze, the magnificence of the ocean, loving yourself and thus a connection to all humanity, these are experiences from the depths of our heart. 

There’s a oneness with life that comes from a deep place of the heart and it’s not something that any human doing can make happen. Although love is instilled in every individual because it’s just a part of being human, one’s conditioning blocks the awareness of it. The connection to the heart is what was awakened in me and many others, it’s what connects us all and it’s there even if you’re not aware of it. It’s everyone’s birth right to experience this love, but it will only occur when the mind is settled enough to know it’s there. Only when there’s a deep love for ourselves which allows for a deep love of others will there be a heart connection with ourselves and with all beings…

"I" Defends Itself

“I” lives in the ignorance of the Conditioned Mind, but when there’s light shed on this, ignorance is no more and “I” no longer needs to defend itself because it no longer sees itself as an adversary…


Awareness of the different thoughts that arise and seeing why some are defended and some are just let go of has immense value in learning what blocks you from living life to the fullest. You will want to develop some sort of discipline that’s going to assist you in differentiating which of your thoughts are beneficial. The ego is “I” and when “I” feels threatened it will defend itself with whatever tools it has developed to do so. These tools aren’t only used to defend itself against others, they’re also used to defend itself against itself. This is the only reason a person reaches for something and it’s strictly because “I” is defending itself from a threat that comes from within. This “I” is the cause of addiction and of all conflicts. Without “I” you still exist, it’s just not in the way the ego ”I” makes it seem.


When you can see the truth that “I” (ego) is not your adversary, there will be no need to defend yourself because it will be seen you are only defending yourself against yourself. There’s no suppressing this nor anything else that arises because suppressing or pushing away is an action that deepens the egos control. To me the awareness of an “I” existence is the beginning of “I” loosening its grip. In acknowledging it the control dissipates somewhat, this happens when the energy of attaching is taken away. Never deny what’s there, just be aware of it and watch it dissolve on its own. The “I” lives in the ignorance of the Conditioned Mind. When there’s light shed on this, ignorance is no more and the ego “I” no longer needs to defend itself because it no longer sees itself as an adversary…

Our True Selves

 

God created us to love. Our true natural selves were created pure, holy, with a deep desire to give of ourselves. We were created humble, desiring to put others first. We were created to be compassionate and kind, empathetic and merciful. Our true selves are honest, patient, courageous, with a respect for others. We were created to love God, who is the source of light, life and love. Deep down inside, we know we were made to love. We know this because when we experience genuine love for others, our whole beings are lifted up. Our hearts are filled. We experience joy! We know that we know it is right! Somewhere deep inside of ourselves, we know that we were meant to love. When someone loves us in return, we experience a fulfillment that transcends our ordinary existence. We feel complete. This is what God intended for us to experience every moment of our lives. 

However, God also gave us the gift of free will. We are the masters of our own destinies. What happens when we choose to act contrary to our true nature? Yes, that’s right. Our conscience kicks in. Because God loves us so much, He does not want us to experience pain and suffering, so He gave us a conscience to act as a warning when we contemplate actions that may cause us grief, sorrow and regret. What happens when we act on a temptation? What happens when we sin? Yep! Our conscience causes us pain and suffering, but not as much pain as the consequences of our sinful actions may cause us. 

Have you ever told a little lie, one that wouldn’t hurt anyone but benefitted you in some way? Maybe it was to cover up for something you did, which you knew was wrong. What happens? We end up compounding that little lie with a multitude of other lies just to cover up the first lie. Often, the lies spiral out of control. If our lie is uncovered, we become embarrassed or ashamed. We lose credibility. Others do not trust us. Have you ever become so angry that you said things you regretted? Have you ever done something to please yourself at the expense of another?  We have all experienced the consequences of sin. More serious sins have more profound consequences that may cause us greater pain and suffering.  

What happens when we continue to act in opposition to our true nature, contrary to our true selves? We lose ourselves. First, we experience the initial pangs of conscience. If we disregard these warnings, we experience regret, shame and guilt. If we ignore these responses, we may convince ourselves that our actions were justified. Our thinking becomes impaired and begins to deceive us. We dull the warning signals. Our conscience, God, is silenced. We slip farther and farther away from our true nature. We forget how to love God and love others. We lose the joy in life. Our peace is disturbed by conflicting desires, which do not fulfill us, do not make us complete. Eventually, we lose self-respect because deep down inside, we know that we know we are acting against our true nature. We suffer from the consequences of actions that are not in sync with our true selves. 

Our society is obsessed with building up self-esteem. We embark on new diets and exercise programs. We set goals for ourselves and busy ourselves in trying to accomplish them. We fill our calendars with things to do, and we take pride in achieving our goals. We seek the approval of others and are disappointed when others do not acknowledge our endeavors. If we cannot keep up with our to-do list, we become stressed. Slowly, we lose momentum, and our self-esteem erodes once again. Self-esteem is not nurtured by our accomplishments, but rather by the condition of our hearts. If our hearts are open, generous, and loving, we are at peace with ourselves.

Remembering Christ’s sacrifice for us on the cross reminds us how much He loves us. Knowing how much God loves us strengthens our love for Him. When we love God, He fills us with His love in return. He fills us with Himself, the Holy Spirit, the source of love. When our hearts are filled with His love, we return to our natural selves, our true selves. We are no longer focused on our to-do list. We stop and live in the moment. We notice those around us, who God has placed in our lives, those who support and encourage us, as well as those who need our encouragement. Rather than focusing on our accomplishments, we concentrate on our relationships, our relationship with God, as well as with others. Building our relationship with Christ and with those God has place in our lives builds our self-esteem. Discovering the gifts God has bestowed upon us to share with others builds our self-esteem. Developing compassion and kindness, generosity and love brings us closer to our true selves.

According to King David in Psalms 139:14, each of us was uniquely, “fearfully and wonderfully made.” In this context, “fearfully” means “awesomely” made. In other words, we should be in awe or amazement because “it was you (God) who formed my inward parts; you knit me together in my mother’s womb…intricately woven…In your book were written all the days that were formed for me, when none of them as yet existed” (Psalms 139:14-16). To Jeremiah, God said “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you” (Jeremiah 1:5). God takes great care in creating each of us, and He knows us better than we know ourselves. Through Christ and the Holy Spirit, we are able to discover our true selves. The Holy Spirit will reveal to us our extraordinary gifts, our purpose in life, and He will guide our path. When we embrace our true selves, when we share our gifts and live out our purpose in life, we will experience joy and peace. In Christ, we are complete. Our self-esteem is not determined by how others see us. Our self-image is rooted in Christ, and only He can reveal to us our true nature, our true selves. 

© 2017  Helen Kamenos  All rights reserved

http://www.helenkamenos.com/

"Who Am I? Discover Yourself" FREE Workbook

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"Who Am I? - Discover Yourself"

A Workbook to Help You Recognize Your Potential

Includes 8 Steps to Healing Wounded Relationships

Have you ever asked yourself “Who am I?” Are we the roles we serve in our lives: fathers, mothers, employees, bosses, students, teachers, men or women? Are we our job titles? Are we athletic or out of shape? Are we talented with words or music? Are we rich or poor? Famous or obscure? Who are you? We wear many hats throughout our lives, often simultaneously. Others often define us by our roles, but if we search inside of ourselves, how do we define our own identities? Do you think about it or do you define yourself by how others see you? Do they truly know you? Do you know yourself?

Discover who you are in Christ. The attributes given to us by Jesus at the Sermon of the Mount are those that are valued by God. They are the characteristics God bestowed upon us when He made us in His image. These attributes are necessary to be able to love unconditionally, the way God loves us. Developing these traits helps us live happier lives with more fulfilled relationships. They unlock our potential. 

Do you possess these traits and to what degree? Find out what attributes you need to develop in order to reach your potential. This workbook also includes “8 Steps to Healing Wounded Relationships” as taught by Christ through the Beatitudes.

We often spend time caring for our physical health, exercising or watching what we eat, but we do not always spend enough time on our spiritual or emotional well-being. Often, ignoring our emotional health leads to anxiety and stress. Our physical well-being may extend our lives, but our spiritual welfare determines the quality of our lives. Take the time to reflect on your spiritual and emotional development in order to realize your potential and help you improve your relationships.      

         

This 14 page workbook in pdf format includes:

• 3 questionnaires to help you discover yourself
• A chart to help you analyze the traits you possess, valued by God
• Opportunities for reflection
• Identify which attributes you admire in yourself and others
• Determine which characteristics are your strengths and weaknesses in developing better relationships

You will also receive my FREE monthly newsletter, Defending the Faith.

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